People who shouldn't be trusted

As kids we were all told by our parents who we should and shouldn’t trust. We were informed never to take candy from strangers (spoil sports), we were told to watch out for creepy old men with puppies and we were told never to go home with a stranger even if they knew our parents’ names. So what? Now because we’re all grown up, does it mean the threat of awful people no longer exists? Of course not!

Bad people are everywhere; working next to you, serving you coffee and smiling at you briefly on the train (those evil geniuses). These buggers are so much harder to spot the older we get, so to help us all out I have complied a short list of people who I think, shouldn't be trusted.

People who put up bad photos of you on the internet because they look good in them. There is a special place in hell for this type of person. May they get 7 years of bad selfies for such a heinous act.

People who put up bad photos of you on the internet because they look good in them but try and convince you that you look good in them too. This person is clearly a deluded liar and is not your friend. After this, who knows what they’re truly capable of?!!? Identity theft? Releasing smallpox? The possibilities are endless…

People who say they hate specific species of animals. As a cat lover, I regularly hear how people hate cats. I don’t think I’ve ever asked why or tried to convince them otherwise because why bother? These people are clearly morons. How can you hate a species of animals? That’s like saying you hate plants. It’s odd and you seem a bit serial killery. Stop it and start hating something more worthwhile, like over population or The Weekend’s hair.

(Seriously though, his hair angers me)

People who spit in public places. I think this one is self-explanatory. It’s gross. You’re gross. Stop being gross. Gross.

People who say they forget to drink enough water. There are two main reasons why you shouldn’t trust someone who says this. 1. They’re either a complete idiot or 2. They’re a droid. My guess is the latter but if you are one of these people who say this sort of stuff, what else do you forget to do? Breathe? Stop being weird and drink more water #firstworldproblems

People who see the good in everything. They were clearly sent here by Satan to test us all. Them and their eternal happiness should not be trusted…

People who say they don’t like guacamole. If you don’t like guacamole you’re eating bad guacamole. Simple. Guacamole is life. Guacamole is Queen. So if you come across someone who says they don’t like guacamole, run. Run as fast as you can, far, far away. Hurry.

People who give back handed compliments. People who can’t be up front, honest and blunt about their feelings, cannot be trusted. Bish, I am 27 years old and have met much meaner looking people than you. Stop giving half arsed insults disguised as compliments and just tell me you don’t like me.

I hope this small list of rantiness has helped at least one person. Have you got any examples you'd like to add to the list? Let me know in the comments below.

PS. Don't take this personally. It's a JOKE!